Does dating and courtship help couples stay together? How important are the beginning stages of a romantic relationship? Romantic relationships are very difficult to maintain and to predict.
The stages of a relationship before marriage have more of an impact on the marriage than we give it credit for. Now, I have never been married or gotten engaged, so take my word with a grain of salt, but here is why I think that the dating/courtship phase of the relationship is crucial for a successful marriage.
Before we get into that, though, we first need to understand all the stages that lead up to marriage. These stages are as follows: dating, courtship, engagement, and finally marriage. The word "dating" has been thrown around in many different cultures and means some very different things. The way I define "dating" is taking someone out to have fun with them and enjoy each other's company. Dating starts with a formal plan to do an activity with someone and get to know them. Dating a lot of people is great! In this sense, it is just having fun with other people and enjoying the time you share together. I have taken a lot of my friends out on dates before and nothing romantic happened, which is totally fine. Getting to know that person on a different level is always my goal when going on dates. Dating is an excellent way to get to know the person you are interested in and will assist you in determining what you truly desire in a spouse.
Courtship is more concerned with the romantic aspect of the relationship. This is the part that you see in all the cliche romantic comedies of the kiss in the rain and doing cute things like bringing flowers or cooking them breakfast. You could also think of it back in the medieval times when courting was making a clear effort to marry a person within a royal family. Courtship and dating are different stages in the early relationship. The courtship stage is a great time and if there were some tender, loving memories associated with this stage, it is easier when the marriage is rocky to look at the time you guys shared together that first sparked your love for each other. A good courtship is crucial to a successful marriage.
The other stages are pretty self-explanatory, so I won't get into those, but the principle I'm really trying to drive home is that the early stages of the relationship, dating and courtship, can later have an effect on the later stages of the relationship. It is crucial to set good habits and create bonds in the early stages because those will carry over and will have a great impact on how the marriage will continue into the future. The development and maturity of the relationship need to progress steadily throughout the romantic relationship. The relationship needs to be satisfying for both parties and should lead to happiness and a wholesome connection. Maturity and the connection will only grow with time, leading to a more deep and personal connection.
Now, this relates to divorce in many different ways. Most divorces happen because of a lack of connection, communication, and commitment. What I call the "three C's" of relationships. All of the "C's" grow from the early stages of the relationship, and it leads to more connection, more communication, and more commitment. I'm not a certified marriage counselor, but I strongly suggest, if you are not married, making the dating and courtship stages a special time for both of you. This will lead to more of a change in a life-long marriage with joy and complete satisfaction for both of you. If you are married currently, it's not too late for you. Start going on dates and creating those memoreis of love and joy now. This will only strengthen your connection, communication, and commitment. The only downside to dating and courtship is that you might be down a few dollars, but I say that it is worth it in the end.
Thank you for actually reading all of this! I hope this helped you!
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